gacob:

they were right. guns don’t kill people. people kill people. people are now illegal and the crime rate is zero

businesscatte:

otiggerifico:

It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

This is a work of art.

  • Pregnant woman: oh my god he's kicking!!
  • Me: *punches her in the stomach* you think it's fucking cool to hit girls you little bitch??